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Light beyond the clouds
Depression. It isn’t just an occasional feeling of unhappiness that typically passes within a few days of its onset. Indeed, sometimes feeling low is a normal and expected feature of our emotions. On the the contrary, depression can be a debilitating, sustained feeling of dejection and despondency that permeates every aspect of your life and try as you might, you just can’t shake it. Millions of people can attest to this and I am one of those people.
I can’t put a finger on when I first started to suffer from depression. Initially, I accepted this feeling as a part of me so I didn’t attempt to address it. I didn’t even label or acknowledge it as depression. It was a feeling that I became so familiar with that trying to address it seemed as futile as changing who I was.
I find it near impossible to articulate how depression feels. There’s an emptiness and darkness that is omnipresent to your life. I would often liken it to a dementor or a dark, ominous cloud that refused to go away and would spoil anything remotely pleasant. Regardless of how hard I might try to ignore it, that dark cloud would remain to remind me that my depression hadn’t gone anywhere and could become heavier and darker whenever it chose to.
